NATO Pinky Swears that it's a "Defensive Alliance"

After countless bombs and war crimes, the aggressive military force has a new message

After decades of bombs in Libya and Serbia, after an endless proxy war in Ukraine that’s killed countless civilians, after a career of war crimes and torture and destruction, NATO had the guts to gaslight you into believing they’re a defensive alliance.

In a cute infographic cartoon posted to Twitter this week, the militaristic force told viewers that everything you’ve heard about NATO, the bombs, the invasions, the war crimes, isn’t true, it’s actually just (you guessed it) Russian propaganda.

‘No,’ they tell us, as funny sounds and happy music play, ‘NATO does not seek confrontation and poses no threat to Russia. The myth needs to be dismantled.” So the next time they’re dismantling a country, staging a coup, and killing civilians, please remember: it’s all in defense. They pinky swear it’s true.

Plus, Vivek Ramaswamy, who you may have seen at last night’s GOP debate, can’t remember what AR-15 stands for, but he does stand by his use of Eminem’s “Lose Yourself,” which he sang at the Iowa State Fair, even as the rapper denounces him.

And climate activists bust a wine party for Massachusetts Governor Maura Healey and get whined at by corporate lobbyists for being rude, even as one billionaire tells them “I don’t mind if you die.”

As always, there’s a lot to throw down, and Katie and Aaron are ready to go. It’s our Thursday bonus episode. Let us know in the comments what corporate media monologues, interviews, or anything else you want to see on the next Thursday Throwdown.

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