The Clocks Won't Run on Time

Live chat today at 12pm EST with Katie and Wilson in the Substack app chat!

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Hey Useful Idiots,

Bad news: turns out, even the clocks are bad.

In this world of Useful Idiots where we constantly and slowly pull back the curtain of empiric propaganda (just last week in our interview we broke down some hardened lies about Korea), I’m constantly finding new tricks used by the leaders to covertly control our lives.

And my newest revelation may sound melodramatic, but I’m slowly learning I can’t trust anything. Here it is:

THEY’RE CONTROLLING US WITH THE CLOCKS!

Longtime Absurd Arena readers may remember my favorite band Mischief Brew, a folk punk band with the best anarcho-punk songwriting I’ve ever heard. And on my zillionth listen to Every Town Will Celebrate, I caught a new lyric.

“Someday that man will come here too
With that magic hat, spit and glue
He’ll wash the stone, paint the brick
Rename the streets
And make the clocks all tick
On time. He’ll make us run on time”

After living 25 years with clocks and running on time, I simply assumed that was the correct and safe way to live. But it turns out, the punks think different: why are we the only animal that has to run on time? Why is it so important to be somewhere? Could we be controlled so easily if it weren’t for time?

And what else are they doing to trick us?

Join Katie and me at 12pm est to become anarcho-punk rockers and debate the tricks they use to manipulate the people. And then we’ll decide: do we need to break the clocks?